Being a Good Support in Depression

Broken people, making broken promises, result in broken relationships.  

Who are the broken people? You, me, and the rest of mankind itself. This week I’d like to highlight the brokenness so commonly found in depression.

If you or a friend is experiencing depression, here are a few tips on being a good friend and support. 

 

1. No one story of brokenness is the same. Brokenness manifests itself in countless fashions. Each human is unique from the rest; and so it is with brokenness. If you are a human (or even if you aren't), you have a story and a background that has shaped you into who you are today that is unique to anyone else in the world. Do not assume that you know exactly how they are feeling. Though your experiences may be similar to theirs, validate their feelings. They may be experiencing the same condition but remember they are experiencing it in a very different context.   

2. Be a presence. Not just a presence, a supportive presence. Don't feel like you have to name the elephant in the room by always bringing up their depression. What they need most is a friend and a safe place so that when they are ready to talk about their experience and pain they feel comfortable to do so.  

3. Don't take things personally. Most likely, if your friend is experiencing any range of depression, you will probably feel ignored and could eventually become bitter towards them. Having an internal battle everyday is hard enough with depression, they don't need friends who ignore them. A quick handwritten note expressing your love and support for them could do wonders for those experiencing depression. A lot of the times, it is hard to be around others when your struggling with depression but knowing that others are thinking of you and are there for you speaks loudly to them. 

4. If you are the one depressed, don't ignore your friends. This can be very damaging to relationships. It is important to recognize that depression affects not only yourself but others as well. Do not be shy in being raw with your close friends. If you are not ready to share your life with them yet, a simple word of appreciation will uplift your friends. Never hide your depression from your friends. True friends can tell when you are struggling and it is hurtful when they know something is being purposefully hidden from them.